It means that you're comfortable with every version of yourselves and you love them about each other anyway - even the not so cute ones. A loving or stable relationship doesn't mean that you or your partner pretend to be happy when you're really upset, or that you act like you're OK when you're not. Brown shares that it's literally impossible to be kind, vulnerable, trusting, courageous, self-aware, and gracious all the time, 24/7. Though you may hope to be your #best #self at all times, Dr. "None of us can provide this to our partners unconditionally, but we can strive to be as loving as possible." "Love requires emotions and actions that express kindness, vulnerability, trust, courage, self-awareness, and gratitude," Dr. Brown shares, though it's natural to want and even need love from the people you care about, constantly giving and receiving love is no small task. "When we can trust our loved one with our most vulnerable thoughts and feelings, we are experiencing love in its highest form. "Being able to express our true authentic selves is one of the hallmarks of a great relationship," Dr. "Babe, you were just a huge jerk to that barista, why don't you go apologize?") means being able to really love them - through good times and bad. Brown shares that being able to accept that your partner did something wrong (i.e. If your SO cheated on an exam and you feel weird about it, or if they were super rude to their mom at dinner and you think they owe her a major apology, "unconditional love" doesn't mean suppressing your feelings or never calling someone out. "We are going to make judgments about each other and that is not unconditional." "Even in the very best of relationships, there are inevitably going to be disagreements and misunderstandings," Dr. Gary Brown a prominent couples' therapist in Los Angeles, though some may interpret "unconditional love" to mean never disagreeing with your partner or thinking of them differently regardless of their words or actions, healthy relationships involve embracing fluidity and change every step of the way. When I was 16, my New England, Catholic parents were sure that the woman I babysat for was going to fire me for piecing my nose, and insisted that I call her to tell her "what I had done." As I nervously dialed, she laughed into the receiver saying, "We don't care! It's all unconditional love over here!" Though I no longer fear getting fired over a piercing, her words still remind me of the real meaning of unconditional love, and why it's so important to keep it 100% real with all the people in my life - especially the ones I date.Īccording to Dr.
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